


Promise Me

by Stilinskis (MollyHime)



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Character Death, Grieving, M/M, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-01
Updated: 2013-12-01
Packaged: 2018-01-03 03:17:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1065119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MollyHime/pseuds/Stilinskis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s been four months, three days, six hours, and eighteen minutes since the last time he saw Stiles alive. It’s been that long since the last time Scott felt alive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Promise Me

**Author's Note:**

> I am the devil, I am well aware of that. I don't know why I wrote this. I was watching Cloud Atlas and the letter one of the characters narrated made me think of this, and well this happened. I'm so sorry.

It’s been four months, three days, six hours, and eighteen minutes. The worst stretch of his life imaginable. It’s been that long since the last time he saw Stiles alive, before the cancer that took his mother took him too. It’s been that long since the last time Scott felt alive. It had been four months, three days, five hours since Stiles had made a joke about Scott never leaving his side, how they needed to have a talk about his codependency. Four months, three days, six hours since Stiles had looked at him, eyes full of words he would never say, and told him he would always love him.

 

And Scott couldn’t go on. He couldn’t keep going without Stiles, he wouldn’t. He had a gun, loaded with a wolfs bane bullet he’d stolen from Allison. He carried it silently to the room they had shared. The room that was full of the scent of them. He collapsed to his knees, a sob tearing its way out of his throat. He reached for Stiles’ drawer. He never opened it, was scared the scent would fade if he did. But he was leaving now, it didn’t matter anymore. He was going to die, and he was going to be with Stiles. The drawer slid open, and right in the middle laid an envelope. ‘Scott’ was written across it in Stiles’ messy script. The gun clattered to the floor, and with shaking hands, he pulled out the paper.

_Scott,_

_I suppose if you’re reading this, then it means I’m already gone. I’m sure it happened awhile ago. I know you’ll find this when you need to most. First of all, I’m sorry. Second of all, I love you. Remember that. Wherever I am, I love you. I will always love you Scott._

_Do you remember when we met? I don’t, but I remember the stories your mom used to tell us. We were three, and we were at the park. Jackson dumped a bucket of sand on my head, and when I cried, you bit him. We’ve been best friends ever since. That’s kind of the story of our life, isn’t it? People hurt me and you bite them. Too bad there are some things that no one can be protected from. No matter how hard we try, sometimes there’s nothing to be done. I realize that now. It took me a long time, but I think I finally understand. It makes it easier, most days._

_You know, I never wanted to die. I did a lot of stupid shit when we were younger, but I never wanted to die. Even when I rushed into the middle of supernatural battles and you all accused me of having a death wish; even then, I didn’t want to die. I wanted you all to live, and I was prepared to do anything to save you. But I wanted to live to. I still want to live, but the fact that I’m even writing this means I’ve accepted the fact that I can’t._

_Do you remember when were nine, that day you kissed me? I hadn’t been to school in a week because I was so sick, and our moms wouldn’t let you come over because I was contagious and was barely awake. And then when I finally saw you again at school, you tackled me so hard we almost fell over, and you kissed me. I asked you why, and you told me whenever your dad was gone for a long time, your mom always kissed him when he got home. You told me you’re supposed to kiss the person you love the most when you miss them. I never forgot those words, and I’ve always held them close to me. No matter what happened, no matter who got between us, I always knew that you loved me, and that I loved you._

_In the beginning, I kept thinking about how unfair this all is. How I’m too young to deserve any of this. You would think I would die the way I lived, fighting creatures I have a hard time even believing exist. Not like this, never like this. I’ve accepted it, but it’s still not okay._

_How about when we were twelve? That time we had our first fight. I can’t remember what it was about. I should. I don’t think we ever fought again after that. Not really anyway. Sometimes we’d yell at each other for being stupid, or for putting ourselves in danger. But we never fought did we? Because we understood each other so well. Completed each other. You’ve always completed me Scott. That week was the worst week of my life. I missed you so much. So, I bought us ice cream, and I came over to your house. Your mom let me in. I bribed you with ice cream, and when you finally said you weren’t mad at me, I tackled you and kissed you. Because that’s what you do when you miss the person you love most, right? That stain from the ice cream never did come out, but your mom never said anything._

_Do you think I’ll see her? My mom? After all the shit we’ve seen, I have a hard time not believing there’s something else after you die. Maybe that’s what makes all of this just a little easier to accept, the thought of seeing her. I miss her so damn much Scott. I know you know that. I know we don’t talk about me waking up in the middle of the night crying for her. I know we pretend I don’t remember. But I do. And I always remember you holding me for the rest of the night, even after it was okay again._

_We were sixteen when all of this shit started. I’ve felt guilty for all these years. If it hadn’t been for me, you never would have been bitten, and none of this would have happened. Or rather, it would have happened, but you wouldn’t have been involved. So much happened in those couple years. We saw more shit than anyone should ever see. There are things I’ll never be able to forget._

_We were eighteen when we decided we were going to be together forever. I think in reality, we were three when we decided we were going to be together forever. But this was different. This was my hands in your hair, your lips touching mine, you moving in me, we’re going to be together forever. It was when we decided that I am yours, and you are mine. And that’s still true, always._

_Scott. I don’t think I’ve ever been able to tell you what you really mean to me. I don’t think there’s a way to put it in words. When I look at you, sometimes I get so overwhelmed I can’t breathe. When you’re gone I feel like a part of me is missing, the most important part of me. I never feel wholly myself unless I’m with you. I don’t know if you believe in soul mates, but I do. And I know I found mine one day when I was three and I was in a sandbox. No one else has ever mattered to me more in life Scott. There’s never been anyone else like you. I’m sorry that I have to leave first, and I’m sorry that it’s so soon. When we were eighteen, I told you I wanted to spend the rest of my life in love with you. Only, I didn’t think the rest of my life was going to be five years._

_I need you to do something for me Scott, promise me that you will. Don’t keep reading until you do. You promise? I need you to keep going. And I know if you’re reading this then you’re trying to not go on, but I need you to. There’s so much you need to do. You need to take care of our pack. Lydia, Allison, Derek, Isaac, Danny, they all need you. Not the way I need you, but they need you. And your mom needs you, and now more than ever, my dad needs you. Please take care of him Scott, because I can’t anymore._

_I need to tell you one last time Scott. I love you so much, with every fiber of my being. I am yours and you are mine. I can hear you moving downstairs now. We’re going to the hospital again, but I know this time we’re not both coming back. I know you’re going to be there until the end. But I know I’ll see you again one day. When it’s your time, I’ll be waiting for you. You better be damn old when I see you again._

_But if I have to die, at least I know I’ll die in your arms. And I think I’m okay with that._

_Stiles_

He lay there, and he cried, and he cried. For how long, he didn’t know. It might have been hours, it might have been days. He didn’t know if he would ever get up again. But he would, because Stiles made him promise to, and he had promised. Because he could never deny Stiles anything, not even in death.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it! Feel free to come find me on tumblr http://dylanwoahbrien.tumblr.com


End file.
